ESFJs have a need to feel like they belong. Because of this, every relationship that the ESFJ will begin has a high level of meaning to them. Social validation helps to define their existence. No relationship is approached in a casual fashion. They will provide support that doesn’t waiver, but in return, they also need to know that their relationships will consistently remain by their side.
When it comes to ESFJ relationship compatibility, their best matches tend to be ISFPs or INFPs. This is because of the sensitive nature of the ESFJ. Any bit of criticism that comes from a relationship is taken seriously and it can create deep wounds. These two personality types recognize this and can broach a difficult situation in a way that appropriately communicates to the ESFJ in a non-threatening way what may need to change.
ESFJs Love To Make People Happy
Part of the reason behind the love of serving others for the ESFJ is that it gives their social status a boost. Helping others makes the ESFJ a priority for that person, even if just for a moment, and that creates a tangible, personal reward. They also like to see others find success and define themselves by how they can provide that support.
For that reason, the ESFJ may spend all day at work and then all evening at home cleaning and doing laundry just so their partner can watch a favorite show or be on the internet. They’ll work hard at their education, but use their knowledge to lift their relationships higher than themselves. They are cautious and careful, but they are also innovative and strong.
Affirmation Is Important To the ESFJ
Even strong INFPs or INFPs can struggle from time to time at how often the ESFJ needs to be validated. The ESFJ will constantly ask or seek proof of how their relationships feel about them on a personal level. They need this because they always have a suspicion that someone may not love or appreciate them as much as is believed.
When it comes to the relationship, if the ESFJ can be shown that they are appreciated, then they are going to be at their happiest and return the favor. All personality types can do this, but the ISFP and INFP personality types excel at it and that’s why they are the best possible match.