ISTJs have a lot going for them. They are incredibly loyal and they are true to their word. When the marriage vows say that they will stay committed for life, they take that very seriously. They work hard to preserve a relationship and are good listeners. They’re even remarkably good with their spending habits and don’t back away from a conflict if there will be a benefit coming out of the other side.
The only problem for the ISTJ is that they tend to believe they are always right. It’s a struggle for them sometimes to see the other side of a perspective. Their competitive nature makes virtually every conversation become a chance to prove themselves. They are silently appreciative, value structure, and don’t generally recognize the emotions of others until it is too late.
Who Is Most Compatible With the ISTJ?
ESTPs and ESFPs tend to match up the best with the ISTJ. This is because their outgoing personalities are warm and welcoming to the ISTJ and this encourages them to open up and talk without feeling like they need to prove themselves. ESTPs and ESFPs also appreciate the focus on realism that the ISTJ tends to have. Instead of being concerned with opinions and emotions, it becomes a fact-based relationship between the ISTJ and these two extroverted personalities.
Expect to see the ISTJs stick to traditions whenever possible. This doesn’t mean they are uncomfortable in more “modern” roles, but women who have this personality type tend to defer to their partners because that’s what has always happened. Men with this personality type tend to focus on scheduling and routine to make sure that life goes on without a problem.
The Biggest ISTJ Struggle: Communication
ISTJs do not normally communicate their feelings. They will struggle in relationships where a point of emphasis is to discuss emotion. They struggle to communicate in general unless they feel the need to compete or prove that their opinion or perspective is correct. This is the biggest challenge that any partner of this personality type will face.
Anyone can have a beneficial and loving relationship with an ISTJ. It’s just the extroverted sensing that the ESTPs and ESFPs have that helps to balance out the introverted sensing of the ISTJ that makes them a better match.